Here's a Tip for Essay Writers!

Many of my peers apparently are going to do essays as a regular part for their exam. Now, in an essay, I'm sure everyone might have that sinking feeling that you don't have sufficent words to meet the word requirement, right? (I do hear of word limits, though, and i'm afraid this entry won't be as helpful.)

There are 9 easy steps in achieveing longer sentences.

Here's the sentence we are trying to lengthen: More nightclubs will bring trouble to the streets.

STEP 1: Begin a statement with an indication to studies, even though you are not aware of it. No one's gonna care anyway. If some obnoxious KI guy/girl asks you, the see Step 5.

Studies have shown that more nightclubs will bring trouble to the streets.

STEP 2: Replace simple words with more complicated words. You may break simple words up for definition, or you can also replace them with a foreign quid pro quo.

Studies have shown that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services will bring ominent trouble in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares.

STEP 3: Use vague, sophiscated verbs or adjectives. The vaguer the better.

Studies have identified the fact that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services will bring ominent trouble in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares.

STEP 4: More adjectives can help in lengthening the sentence further.

Various studies have identified the fact that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services will bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thoroughfares.

STEP 5: Convince that your studies are in fact true, (although you are not aware of it) by saying that there are many, it's just that the person was too ignorant for his/her own good. By the way, cahange all wills to woulds and can to coulds here.

A number of various applicable studies have generally identified the fact that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services would usually bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thoroughfares.

STEP 6: You are now clear to write any redundancies.

A number of various applicable studies carried out by various research institutions have generally identified and indicated the fact that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services at night such as selling liquor would usually bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares where people will encounter many inconveniences because of them.

STEP 7: Write "it is" or "there are" expressions to make yourself sound innocently smart.

There is no escaping the fact that it is considered very important to note that a number of various applicable studies carried out by various research institutions have generally identified and indicated the fact that nocturnal establishments that offer entertainment services at night such as selling liquor would usually bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares where people will encounter many inconveniences because of them.

STEP 8: Slip in lawyers' tongue here, to make yourself sound superior.

There is no escaping the fact that it is considered very important to note that a number of various applicable studies carried out by various research institutions have generally identified and indicated the fact that nocturnal establishments, despite being legal, that offer entertainment services at night between but not limited to 8 pm till early morning such as selling liquor would usually bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares where people, mainly residents living in the area, will encounter many inconveniences because of them.

STEP 9: For the final touch, add in Greek or Latin words.

There is no escaping the fact that it is considered very important to note that a number of various applicable studies studies ipso facto carried out by various research institutions have generally identified and indicated the fact that nocturnal establishments, despite being legal, that offer entertainment services at night between but not limited to 8 pm till early morning such as selling liquor would usually bring all sorts of ominent troubles in the neighbourhoods and thouroughfares where people, mainly residents living in the area, will encounter many inconveniences because of them.

To remind you how the sentence started out: More nightclubs will bring trouble to the streets.

Have fun!

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Anyway, I've prepared the new music for this month, which I fondly call Blogosphere II